PostSecret

*What is a PostSecret?*

• It’s too soon and you aren’t going to ask but for the record, I would say yes.
• Your heart is an idiot.
• I still don’t believe you love me.
• The truth will come out sooner than we know.
• Whenever someone reminds me of the fact that you never forget your first love, all I can think is oh Fuck.
• I graduated from high school 1967.  So did the girl I love, she never knew.  Now, 2 marriages, 1 war, and 40 years later, I can honestly say:  There has not been a day in the last 40 years that I have not thought of her with love and regret.
• I don’t tell him but flowers are a waste.
• No one sends you flowers when you are crazy.
• I wish you still loved me the way you did when we drove down this road in Montauk.
• I was going to tell you, but then you left.
• I gave my boyfriend a shoebox and asked him to decorate it so that when I broke up with him the next month I would have something to store his knickknacks in.
• I wear my ring on my right hand around my parents…he’s not my boyfriend…he’s my fiancé.
• I still feel it.
• I wanted her so bad, until I saw her feet…Sorry.
• I was involved in an unhealthy relationship, but could not completely break away.  Friends, family, everyone told me I deserved so much more.  I knew they were right.  I was so frustrated with my hesitation to make a final decision to let go of my hope that he would eventually change back to how he was in the beginning.  These Sunday secret gave me the last push to finally break away.  It is now over.  There Sunday secret made me see the humor in a breakup, the painful sorrow of unrequited love, the bliss of being in love, but most importantly, for me, the hope that ‘good love is on the way.’
• If only I could fall out of love with you, I would.
• I’m just the receptionist.  Your family owns the company.  I could have any number of better jobs with my MBA and $100,000 college education.  But I stay…because of how you smile at me every morning when you come in the door.  I secretly love you.
• When you were asking God for me to marry you, I was busy asking God for someone else to marry.  I’m sorry.
• HIV positive or negative, I still want to spend the rest of m life with you!
• I feel more like me when you are there than when I’m alone.
• I didn’t enlist to escape you.  I enlisted to pay for our wedding.  Will you marry me?
• I fell in love with a boy who doesn’t love me back.
• Your smile makes me want to misbehave.
• I’ve become embarrassed by how many times I’ve been in love.
• Be mine.  Nothing more.  Nothing less.
• This year for Valentine’s Day, I am giving my sweetheart a box of chocolates I bought on clearance last year.
• I will never be blinded by love again.
• I wish she could see the world through my eyes.
• I hate you for loving her.
• I don’t mind being alone on Valentine’s Day.  I love the independence.
• I want to tell you everything, but I just can’t.
• You told me your darkest secret and my heart ached because I realized that I couldn’t possibly love you anymore.
• Books get me sexually excited.
• (On the back of a sonogram postcard) I know she’s not mine.  I love her anyways.
• If you’re waiting for a sign, this is it.  Do it.  It will be amazing.
• I wish for a beautiful life.
• There is enough DNA on this postcard to convict me.
• I have finally spoken my secret aloud, into this envelope, and sealed it forever.
• I used to pee into snowballs before throwing them at friends.
• I steal small things from my friends to keep memories of how much I love them.
• I will never stop loving her.
• He was never that into me, but I let him fake it for over a year.
• For years I’d hurt myself so that he’d notice me.
• Two and a half years after we broke up, I still wear a pair of his boxers.
• I broke up with my boyfriend who used to call me “darling” when we made love.  And I fell in love with a man who calls me slut when he fucks me.
• I’m in love with a man I’ve never met.
• I started using speed to get his attention and affection. All I got was addicted.
• Without her, I’m ruined.
• She never gave me a chance.
• I still love you.
• I believe in destiny and I think I know mine.
• I use sarcasm to hide how ridiculously vulnerable I am.
• I like to box with concrete walls without boxing gloves.  (The pain in my hands helps me forget about the pain in my heart).
• Even if I have plenty of friends, I always feel alone.
• I make everyone believe I like to be different but really I don’t know how to fit in.
• I go to the movies and try to image what life would be like if only I could fit in.
• I’m known as the funny one but I don’t crack jokes to make people smile, it’s because I fear feeling their sadness, without suffering, no compassion.
• I stay in a job I hate because I know I won’t pass a drug screen anywhere else.  (and I do drugs because I hate my job.)
• I’m so grateful to the psychiatrist I saw when I was 19 who told me I would be fine again.  He saved my life.
• I regret every decision I’ve ever made except my abortion.
• When I was a young teenager, I used to baby-sit my next door neighbor’s son.  When he was asleep, I would go into their bedroom and go through their bedside drawers.  I found a packet of condoms and I’d put a pin through the middle of each of them and thus ensured myself another 5 years of babysitting.
• I almost decided not to get out once I knew I’d hit the river.
• The nights I sleep the best, I dream about being shot.
• I didn’t cry at my grandmother’s funeral.  I haven’t cried since.
• I believe my grandmother watches me with great disappointment every time I masturbate.
• I really enjoy funerals.
• I still haven’t told my father I have the same disease that killed my mother.
• I once planned to kill my mother.
• I can’t tell my mom about the rape, she wouldn’t want to know and it kills me.
• I wanted the disease to be my punishment.  He kept going and I didn’t tell him the condom broke.
• I miss feeling close to God.
• While others pray at church I bow my head and think about the TV programs I’m going to be watching.
• I had gay sex at church camp.  Three times.
• Sometimes I really wish I’d just stop talking
• I believe I will accomplish something truly great in this lifetime.  I am going to be 53 tomorrow.
• Everyone who knew me before 9/11 believes I’m dead.
• I’m afraid to take the next step.
• The best secret I know is there is beauty everywhere if you know where to look.
• Psst, Here’s a secret….  Your last mortal thought will be “why did I take so many days—just like today—for granted?”
• I am almost 40 years old and I have an unhealthy reliance on my Magic 8 Ball.
• At the age of ten, I chose cello because then I could spread my legs without my mom yelling at me.
• I haven’t seen my dad since I was nine but sometimes I smell just like him.
• My mom chose my step-dad over me.
• Every time I see you in the elevator, I want to push the emergency stop button.
• When I wear her sweater, I imagine her hugging me.
• Sometimes we put up walls.  Not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.
• If he dies in Iraq, I will be lost.
• I have kept this postcard for about 7 years.  It was given to me by a girl who made me feel worthless, fat, and unloved.  She called herself my best friend.  7 years later, I still feel worthless, and I am fat, but now I know I am loved.  Always have been.
• 5 years later, I still wonder why we didn’t kiss in the park that night.  WE SHOULD HAVE.

• Please always tell them you love them because you never know when they will be gone forever.
• I have no idea who I am.
• I’ll decide who I want to be.
• I think I’m beautiful and I’m willing to wait for someone who agrees.
• I’m tired of running away from my troubles.  I’m even more tired of causing them.
• I gave up my dream because of one bad teacher.
• Fantastic amazing things can still happen to an old fellow like me.
• I no longer feel the awkward obligation to fill silent spaces with mindless self-centered chatter.
• The nicest thing you ever did for me was leave.  Good luck finding a new doormat.
• I have both a wife and a girlfriend and I’ve never felt lonelier.
• I have two master’s degrees and a doctorate and I still feel like a failure.
• I’ll never forgive you for not picking me.
• Even when she holds me, I feel empty for I am thinking of you.
• I hope my illness is fatal so I can have an excuse to give up.
• I love and hate being alone.
• If you jump, I jump.
• I know that I am supposed to be altruistic, but I think you owe me for that party I threw you.
• Each day I leave work with a wave and a confident step, come home, close the door and fearfully whisper “they haven’t yet discovered I have no idea what I’m supposed to be doing.
• When I was a litte girl, my dad was my hero.  I’m 26 now and he still is.
• I am never going to forgive you.
• I think my father is gay.  I keep the secret so my mother doesn’t think her life is a lie.
• I like to stay up late on the computer to look for answers.
• I think GOD is just a big placebo.
• I think I look perfect but everyone cries when they hug me.
• When I was 14, I found my brother’s gay porn.  I also found a book about how to come out.  11 years later I’m still waiting for him to come out.
• I cut holes in my boyfriend’s condoms so I can get pregnant.
• Sometimes, I lie about the time in the morning so she’ll stay next to me a little longer.
• I feel guilty when I accidentally touch my teddy bear between the legs.
• I wish this day could have lasted forever.
• I was going to tell that I love you…the night that you died.
• I’m in love with my best friend.
• As an obnoxious 9 year old, I put a spider in my sister’s bed.  I thought it would be funny to watch her freak out…too bad it turned out to be a hobo (sp?) spider and she ended up losing part of her leg.  12 years later and she still doesn’t know I put it in her bed.  The guilt is killing me.
• I’ve always wanted to run through a car wash.
• My job is to watch the Art Building’s front door.  So I lock one and watch people run into it for fun.
• This is the skirt I was raped in last New Year’s.  Tonight, I’m reclaiming it.
• I know I’m not your daughter.
• The autistic boy I work with is teaching me more than I am teaching him.
• I love when you borrow my clothes.  When I get them back, they smell like you.
• I put a cigarette out on my arm because smoking them wasn’t killing me fast enough.
• Everyday, I look down at my tiny belly and I wish it wasn’t true.  I’ll never forget that date…it’s the day I committed murder.  Everyday I miss you and I never even knew you.
• Sometimes the dreams that come true are the dreams you never knew you had.
• I miss our old problems.
• I want a man to try to rape me to prove I can defend myself.
• My dreams seem so far away.
• When I said “Good luck,” I didn’t mean it.  I didn’t want you to do better than me.
• My prom date was gay.  I pretended not to know.
• In high school, I was so desperate for a boyfriend, I dated a guy who went to Star Trek conventions.  Today, my friends laugh at what a nerd he was…but I am too embarrassed to tell them he dumped me.
• I was raped on a beach.  I hate when people talk about sex on the beach as a sexy thing.
• I was molested for most of my childhood.  Sometimes, I liked it.  I will always hate myself for that.
• My mom killed my dad long before he killed himself.
• I trashed my parents house to look like I had a party while they were out of town…so my mom would think I had friends.
• I sabotage all my relationships so I can be a better musician.

• I wish I were a popular idiot instead of a lonely genius.

Tags: Post Secret, PostSecret, secret